Sunday, September 28, 2008
Here I go!
Well, I figured I'd join the blogging world like so many others of you! I'm a little hesitant because I know that I will be putting myself out there for the world to see...but here goes nothin!
How much do I trust HIM?
I am always amazed at how God shows up in my life in such incredible ways. I have spent my life in church…and have had an amazing love for Jesus for as long as I can remember.
I had decided at a very young age that I wanted to be a child of the Most High God…and follow His Plan for my life…the best way to live! Unfortunately, during my late high school and early college years life dealt me a very unfair hand that left me broken, beaten, bruised, and feeling filthy dirty. Even though I knew in my heart that my God loved and adored me…I began to feel like even though I could trust Him with every other area in my life…well, He couldn’t protect me physically and sexually. It was the moment when I came to this realization that I decided that if I gave myself…no one could “take” anything from me again!
Mark 5: 24-34 tells us of a woman who had been “subject to bleeding for 12 years,” had spent all of her money on doctors trying to fix her…and found no relief. She heard that Jesus was in town and she believed that if she could just “touch His clothes, she would be healed.” The song below by Nicole C. Mullen tells this amazing story of faith.
One Touch (Press)
Been ostracized for 12 years I'm used to being alone
Spent everything I had And now it's gone
I'm used to being put down My issues tell it all
My only hope is anchored In this fall
(Chorus) If I could just touch the hem of His garment
I know I'd be made whole
If I could just press my way through this madness
His love would heal my soul
If only one touch
So many people calling How could He ever know
That just a brush of Him Would stop the flow
If He knew would He rebuke me Or shame me to the crowd
Well I'm desperate 'cause it's never or it's now
If I could just touch the hem of His garment
I know I'd be made whole
If I could just press my way through this madness
His love would heal my soul.
And then suddenly He turned around He said somebody has unleashed my power
Well, frightened and embarrassed I bowed You see I told Him of my troubles
And how... I had to touch the Hem of His garment
And i know I've been made whole
And how I had pressed my way through this madness
And His love has healed my soul.
Then with one word He touched the hem of my garment
And you know I've been made whole
And somehow He pressed His way through my madness
And His love has healed my soul. I tell you He touched me.
He reached way down and touched me
When no one else would touch me Jesus shol' 'nough [[sure enough]]
He touched me...
And I know I've been made whole
I was at a conference recently at the Pepsi Center in Denver where Nicole C. Mullen sang this song…and that is when my Redeeming God unleashed His power and pressed His way through my madness….promising His healing for my soul damaged by so many years of doubt and mistrust.
I’ve been praying for so many years that I would be able to reach a point in my life when I could finally TRUST the Lord with the most treasured, sacred parts of my being…my body and heart…and I believe He’s renewing my hope. I have been afraid and embarrassed by my shameful actions…and though I’ve waited for God to throw down His wrath on me…He instead is pulling me in to His arms and telling me that I am His beautiful, treasured Child. And HE LOVES ME! He will give me the strength and courage to make some very hard choices in the days to come.
The message that has been burned into my soul almost daily for the past several weeks has been this: HOW MUCH DO YOU TRUST GOD! HOW BIG DO YOU THINK HE IS? I’m gonna choose to trust that His way is the best way for me to live. My way has only led to scars and emptiness…I choose to let Him fill my void! I’ll be anxious to see how God uses me in the days to come.
Here is a link to this song…take a minute and listen! It's on her player...One Touch...or if you're my friend on myspace...it's on my profile too!
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=76400394
I had decided at a very young age that I wanted to be a child of the Most High God…and follow His Plan for my life…the best way to live! Unfortunately, during my late high school and early college years life dealt me a very unfair hand that left me broken, beaten, bruised, and feeling filthy dirty. Even though I knew in my heart that my God loved and adored me…I began to feel like even though I could trust Him with every other area in my life…well, He couldn’t protect me physically and sexually. It was the moment when I came to this realization that I decided that if I gave myself…no one could “take” anything from me again!
Mark 5: 24-34 tells us of a woman who had been “subject to bleeding for 12 years,” had spent all of her money on doctors trying to fix her…and found no relief. She heard that Jesus was in town and she believed that if she could just “touch His clothes, she would be healed.” The song below by Nicole C. Mullen tells this amazing story of faith.
One Touch (Press)
Been ostracized for 12 years I'm used to being alone
Spent everything I had And now it's gone
I'm used to being put down My issues tell it all
My only hope is anchored In this fall
(Chorus) If I could just touch the hem of His garment
I know I'd be made whole
If I could just press my way through this madness
His love would heal my soul
If only one touch
So many people calling How could He ever know
That just a brush of Him Would stop the flow
If He knew would He rebuke me Or shame me to the crowd
Well I'm desperate 'cause it's never or it's now
If I could just touch the hem of His garment
I know I'd be made whole
If I could just press my way through this madness
His love would heal my soul.
And then suddenly He turned around He said somebody has unleashed my power
Well, frightened and embarrassed I bowed You see I told Him of my troubles
And how... I had to touch the Hem of His garment
And i know I've been made whole
And how I had pressed my way through this madness
And His love has healed my soul.
Then with one word He touched the hem of my garment
And you know I've been made whole
And somehow He pressed His way through my madness
And His love has healed my soul. I tell you He touched me.
He reached way down and touched me
When no one else would touch me Jesus shol' 'nough [[sure enough]]
He touched me...
And I know I've been made whole
I was at a conference recently at the Pepsi Center in Denver where Nicole C. Mullen sang this song…and that is when my Redeeming God unleashed His power and pressed His way through my madness….promising His healing for my soul damaged by so many years of doubt and mistrust.
I’ve been praying for so many years that I would be able to reach a point in my life when I could finally TRUST the Lord with the most treasured, sacred parts of my being…my body and heart…and I believe He’s renewing my hope. I have been afraid and embarrassed by my shameful actions…and though I’ve waited for God to throw down His wrath on me…He instead is pulling me in to His arms and telling me that I am His beautiful, treasured Child. And HE LOVES ME! He will give me the strength and courage to make some very hard choices in the days to come.
The message that has been burned into my soul almost daily for the past several weeks has been this: HOW MUCH DO YOU TRUST GOD! HOW BIG DO YOU THINK HE IS? I’m gonna choose to trust that His way is the best way for me to live. My way has only led to scars and emptiness…I choose to let Him fill my void! I’ll be anxious to see how God uses me in the days to come.
Here is a link to this song…take a minute and listen! It's on her player...One Touch...or if you're my friend on myspace...it's on my profile too!
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=76400394
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